Happy New Year!

My resolutions...(in no particular order)

1. Drink more water

2. Eat less crap/lose weight

3. Learn to use my camera

4. Play with my kids more

5. Put out more for my poor husband

I think we need a new car seat.....

Do you think she's outgrown it yet?? ha ha!

How Time Flies...

My baby girl is 3 months old. She actually turned 3 months on Christmas eve. Wow. Time flies when you are having fun, doesn't it?? So here ya go, here is her 3 month picture. There are issues with it, but for now, I am happy with it.

In other (related) news, I got my Rebel XT today!!!!! Must buckle down and figure it out now, lol.

To My Dear Friends....

Schedules/Type A Personality

I am impatient. I have a 3 year old. Bad Mixture.

I try so hard to let her figure things out for herself, such as putting on socks, and brushing her teeth etc., BUT when she takes too long and I need to be somewhere, I have to jump in and help, but in true 3 year old fashion, she does not want any help! Then the fight is on...so anywhere, where was I going with this? Oh yeah....schedules.

I live by a schedule. We get up, eat breakfast, get showered, dressed (takes awhile, there is the newborn, the 3yo and me..and read above regarding 3yr old, lol) and then it's darn near lunch time, but we have things to do, it may be an appointment, groceries, a play date, or what have you, but it's in a specific time frame, because then it's nap time (bless my child for still napping!) which must occur between 1 and 2 pm, or she will be CRANKY and sleep too late, which messed with bedtime, which in turn messes with the next day! So to keep things running smoothly in my boot camp, I mean house, we MUST stick tot he schedule!

There are of course exceptions....sometimes we eat lunch early or *gasp* LATE, and there is the occasional day we skip a nap, for a DARN GOOD REASON, but we like the schedule. My daughter thrives on it. I think a lot of the reason I like to stick to a schedule is because I absolutely detest being late. Hate it. And I am annoyed by people who use having kids as and excuse to be late. Yes, shit happens, or puke happens, but on an average day, I like to get where I am going at the proper time.

So what brought this up? Well, our whole day is out of whack! Last week my Mother In Law decided she wanted my 3yo and her 5yo(almost 6yo) cousin to have a sleepover....together...in the same bed! Ok lady! Chelsea is so used to falling asleep alone. She won't fall asleep with me, not with Daddy, no one. She needs her alone time to wind down, look at book, whatever she wants, but ALONE. I decided to let MIL have her, whatever, not my problem if she is up till midnight, ha ha! So here is how it went down.... MIL wanted her early afternoon on Thursday, no nap, so that she may fall asleep earlier...sure! I dropped her off at 2pm. MIL called at 10pm, she finally fell asleep, ha ha! So already she is short 2.5 hours of sleep from her nap, and 2 hours off her regular bedtime...total 4.5 hours. The the kids get up at 5:45...ha! That is 2 hours and 15 minutes earlier than normal....add that to the 4.5? Total of 6 and 3/4 hours short of sleep. Oh my.

I went to pick her up at 11:30 this morning, boy was she CRANKY. So we went thru the drive thru at McDonald's (as my apology for making her sleepover at MIL's, lol) and came home, ate till her eyes were closing, put jammies on and crawled into bed. Poor girl went right to sleep. BUT, I have to wake hey by no later than 4, or bedtime will be ruined, lol.

Am I nuts? Are my schedules too rigid? I don't think so, it works for us.

ME ME ME!!!!

I was tagged by Andrea to do this "all about me" crap, lol, so here goes...

8 things I'm passionate about: (in no particular order)
My family
My friends
Music
Non smoking
Clean floors
Breastfeeding
Proper car seats for kids
Yummy food

8 things I want to do before I die:
Go to somewhere (anywhere) warm and sunny
Take kids to Disney
Have another baby
Learn to take STUNNING pictures
Drive a standard, lol
Be 100% happy with my body
Own a brand new car
Take a college course (not sure what yet, lol)

8 things I say often:
what?
seriously?
really?
hurry up!
I need to pee
shut up
whatever
dude!

8 books I've read recently:
Before I had Chloe I went thru a James Patterson phase, not sure all the names, but there were at least 8!

8 songs I could listen to over and over again:
Talk Dirty To Me - Poison
Oh Holy Night - almost anyone!
Gimme Gimme Gimme - Abba
This Ain't A Love Song - Bon Jovi
Shout At The Devil - Motley Crue
Me - Plumb
In My Arms - Plumb
What Hurts The Most - Rascal Flatts

8 things that attract me to my best friends:
Patience
Humor
Silliness
Trust
Honesty
same views
able to agree to disagree
common interests

8 people who should do this Me game:
um.....I dont' have 8 more people that i know with blogs that were not already tagged, lmao! sorry!

Blue Eyed Girl

Chloe has blue eyes, of course, but I took this picture and wasn't happy with the outcome, so I made it a sepia -ish color and I like it better, but of course, it makes her eyes brown. Try not to notice the light on her forehead and the pin lights in her eyes from the flash that I had to use, grrrr! But she is cute anyway.

Whore?

I just sent my poor husband out to go get me chinese food with the promise of sex once he returns...you know, after I eat the food and watch Grey's Anatomy. Does that make me a whore? So be it!

I Want You To See This

I saw this video today on Youtube, it's very powerful. It is super sad and you will cry if you are human (or at least feel *something* lol) Watch for the little boy near the end with the clothing, you will know it when you see it. SO SAD! And watch the full ending, after the song stops. OMG! And since I feel the need to put a disclaimer, I will, so here goes...it's a country song, and I never said the SONG was good, but it's kinda moving. Ok, here it is...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vaGmeFhqEpk

7 Weird Facts

I was tagged by Jovi, so here ya go...



1. My baby toes are small. Like really small. So small, in fact that they don't have joints. That is small.



2. I get great joy out of plucking my eyebrows....don't know why, I just do!



3. Semi-related to the last weird fact....I love to pick scabs....better than my nose, eh? *cough* Andrea *cough*



4. I still have my childhood blankie...and no, I don't want to talk about it, lol.



5. I have a freckle on my hip that comes and goes, THAT is weird.



6. If I am eating something round, I cannot eat the center. Freak!


7. I cannot wear plain socks, they MUST have some sort of print on them, and preferably NOT WHITE!!

It's all in the eyes.....

I have been neglecting this blog lately....somethng about a newborn and a pre-schooler...I dunno. Anyhoo, I got a new camera and I love it, but need to learn it way better before I get too excited, but I am pretty excited about this picture. I got some wicked catchlights here and dammit, I wanna show the world!! So there ya go! I will be back one of these day to post more, I promise!

I Suck...

More to come someday....you know when I have time , lol.

New Beginnings

Chloe Jane is here. She arrived into our lives on Monday, September 24th at 11:34 am. Labor was 4.5 hours from start to finish, but I won't bore you with the details. She is perfect and we are all so in love with her. Her big sister is doing so well woth her and she is feeding quite well at the breast and will be perfect once we work out a few kinks. I am feeling pretty good, other than some sore areas. We had her out in the world today at 4 days old, it went well, but had to come home cause my boobs were super full! She is a really good baby, sleeps a LOT but gets fussy in the evenings, which is normal. I need to get my sore areas off this chair, so that is all for now.

Perspective

So it turns out there are worse things in this world then being pregnant forever. Like what you ask? Losing a child. A lady I know lost her 8 year old son on Monday night to cancer. Leptomeningeal Gliomatosis to be exact. So rare that I can't even find a proper Google link to share. It involves the spinal cord and brain. Griffin was diagnosed in September 2005, fell ill in February 2006 and died Monday night in his mother's arms after a courageous battle. Poor little fella. And he is a twin, so that's gotta be hard on the other little guy too. At the exact moment he was taking his last hard breaths, I was in the hospital whining that I was NOT in labor yet again. Wow. Really makes you think. Obviously this baby WILL come out, but it doesn't have to be any certain day, she will come when she's damn good and ready. And I will love her with all my heart, because no longer will I be wondering when she will arrive, I will be wondering if I get to keep her. Because you just never know. Losing a child would be so incredibly devastating, I just don't have the words to even begin to imagine what that would be like. So I will take my baby girl when she comes to me and hang on for dear life, because who knows....

And while we are on the topic of death and tragedy, today would have been the birthday of my friend and boss, Heather, who died on February 9th 2006. I think about her almost every day, and it's still hard to believe that she's gone. Her illness came on so fast, and she died within 9 months. She was a friend, a wife and the mother of a 9 year old boy, and another boy who went to Heaven at his birth. Seriously...how much can one family take?? A stillborn son, then cancer?? I won't pretend to understand God's plan. All I know is that I am fortunate. Fortunate that I have one healthy child and presumably am due to give birth to another anytime. I have a roof over my head, and food in my refrigerator. I have amazing friends and a family who loves me. I have a fantastic husband who needs a kick in the ass every once in awhile, but he's a man, it goes with the territory.

So as much as I've wanted this baby out already, and hoped she would come on Heather's birthday as a way to honour her, I will wait patiently, because my little Chloe is her own person with her own mind already and maybe she wants a whole day to herself, which ya can't blame a girl for wanting, right?

Dear Andrea....

No baby yet. I don't even think I am pregnant at this point. I will try to post a real update tomorrow, I just feel like a sack of stupid shit right now...

Killing me softly...

So after my last post, I guess I eventually took a bath and went to bed. Contractions stopped around 11 pm, so I went to sleep. Got up the next morning (Wednesday) and lost a big ole chunk of my mucus plug! Called my hubs and informed him, but he had NO CLUE what a mucus plug was, so I explained to him, he he, he LOVES my ability to discuss openly the most disgusting parts of pregnancy. So anyway, the day went on, and I didn't really feel much movement from the baby, but still felt *some* so wasn't worried. She really is hyperactive and was moving about the amount of a normal baby. Anyway so my OB appointment was at 4:45, got in to see her at 5:30, she did an internal exam, which she was going to do anyway, but I had told her about my plug, so she was definitely gonna do it. So she determined me to be 1cm and 20% thinned and head WAY down....a start at least. Then I told her about the lack of movement, and she said not to worry, they have quiet days, and I was ok with this cause she was definitely still moving. So she checked the heart rate with the doppler, and her heart rate was way higher than normal, up at 180bpm! She is usually about 150. She wanted me to wait and check it again in 10 minutes or so, and it was still high, so combined with the less movement, she decided to send me for a NST at the hospital. They monitored me for 3 hours (yawn!) and determined baby to be ok, cause she started moving lots and HR came down, and then the OB on call checked me and said I was 2cm and 40-50% thinned! YIKES! So he decided to admit me, saying I was in labour and would have the baby tonight! I had been having contractions all day, but nothing that painful....so i asked to go home since I live 7 minutes away and he said ok, but come back when they get stronger/water breaks, etc. That was Wednesday....this is Saturday, I am still home!!!

Ugh!!!!!!

I have been feeling like crap all day, it's getting worse. I have been having contractions since like 3pm, and it's after 8 now. Haven't been timing them, they still seem irregular, but are kinda strong. I laid down when the Hubs came home from work, but couldn't actually sleep, which is weird for me. Ijust want this over with....I hate the fake albour crap, if that's what this is. If it's real, bring it ON baby, but give me a sign that it's real, like you know, my water breaking or something!

Besides, I can't go tonight, Big Brother is on! Maybe I need to take a bath.....at least my husband is sympathetic tonight...hey, maybe THAT is my sign, ha ha!

I have an OB appt tomorrow, hope I can convince her to check for dialation or effacement, but then again, what if I am not progressing? ACK! Maybe I don't want to know....I know, it will happen when it happens...

Time Flies....

Does that mean I am having fun? Sort of, I guess. I am off work now, have been for a few weeks and have been somewhat busy, but also getting in some much needed rest and time with my girl before the new one comes out. I am not a happy pregnant person. I mean, I am HAPPY, but not really good at that "glowing" crap you hear about. I feel like shit most of the time, and am not afriad to tell anyone who asks or will listen. That's right, I am a whiner. But, I am not plannig any more kids, so this will be my last pregnancy, so I should try to milk the sympathy, right? HA! What sympathy?? From my husband? DON'T get me started on him. He is the most selfish man I have ever been married to, ha ha! Seriously, he came home tonight and said he was tired and had a sore back. Seriously?? I was NOT tired for once, only because I loaded up on benadrly last night for the best sleep I've had in 2 weeks and napped for 3 hours this afternoon with Cheslea. HA! But I bet my back hurts more, so there!

Whatever, he is a hard working man and an excellent provider, I am just tired of being pregnant and will be better soon. 3 more weeks, the countdown is ON!

The Countdown is ON!

I have 3 weeks left of work. I work 4 shifts a week, that means 11 shifts, since I worked last night. I can't wait to be done. I know that if I told my doctor honestly how I feel physically at work and afterwards, she would totally put me off, but I just cannot afford it right now, so i am taking it as easy as possible at work, but that is hard, 'cause I am a waitress/bartender and you can't just stop and sit down when you feel shitty. So until then, I do what I can to get thru the nights. And once I am done of work, we can start the countdown to baby Chloe!!

The room is painted! Purple Lace, I love it. Looks really good with the white trim and white furniture. I made the MDF letters for her wall with her name on them. Just need to get the room set up more and I will post some pictures, if I can, it didn't work for me last time...

So it wouldn't be a real post without a little rant, right? The hubs has informed me "he" is hosting a BBQ for his car group friends in 2 weeks. I have several issues with this. 1. we are only starting to build our big dect this weekend coming and i doubt it will be done the next weekend, and if not, then he will be busy with the BBQ and not finishing my damn deck. 2. I am for sure working that night and it sio up to me to find an overnight place for Chelksea to stay. 3. I will be working, like i said, and coming home to drunks camping out in my yard...at 33 weeks pregnant..and then having them tramp through my house at all hours of the night to pee. and finally 4. I have to clean my house in preparation, then after they leave.

***SIGH***

He doesn't see the issue. Of course he doesn't, he's a MAN. He has NO idea how much pain I am in on a daily basis and that is even before any extra stresses on my body, like cleaning a house. he doesn't even care if it's clean for when they come over, but I DO! He also just ASSUMES my mom will take Cheslea that night. Maybe she will, but she also might have plans. Anyway, nothing I can do about it now.

Ok, time to post this and pretend to accomplish something today!

10 more weeks!

I am 30 weeks preggo today! Yikes! Not ready!! But yesterday we bough paint, so that is a step forward! I want to paint RIGHT NOW, but Hubs is mowing the lawn, grrr and I don't dare start it myself. Ugh, I am in a fowl mood for other reasons, my feelings got hurt today over something completely different and not by my hubs, by a friend, so I need to just sign off for now. I just can't stop thinking about it though. *sigh*

Bad Day

Today is bad. First, we got up too early. Then, I realized Chelsea had crapped in her night time pull up. She has "issues" with the pooping. She will only seems to do it in her panties or in her pull up. We were making progress, until the other day, not sure what changed exactly. Anyway, so after I discovered the crappy pull up, we went to sit on the potty/toilet (we alternate). We typically sit for about an hour, then she finally poops, and it's the size of Texas, maybe a little bigger, depending on how long it's been in there. So 2 hours later, she is still screaming (from torture, not pain) and nothing came out. I gave her the benefit of the doubt and let her off, thinking maybe she really didn't need to go. WRONG!!! We came downstairs, ate, watched TV (missed our library group in the meantime) and had an early lunch. Keep in mind I am almost 30 weeks pregnant, and had sat on the ceramic bathroom floor for 2 hours already, so i was looking forward to a nice afternoon nap. We went upstairs for a pee before nap and when she pulled down the panties, guess what I saw?!?!? SHIT!!!! So I was MAD. I made her sit again.....for 2 more hours! Because this time, i knew she had to go....right?? After 2 hours, I had to give up again, cause we had to get to an appointment at 4:15, and we already missed OUR nap and I was PISSED. I really do try to be patient, I really do but COME ON!!!

So we went to our appointment, went for supper and went to pick up a few things. At Walmart, I realized she stunk again. Crapped her pants. WHAT THE FUCK????? So we are home again, she is upstairs with Daddy, who has the patience of a wet noodle, and she is screaming her poor little head off cause she is so tired and wants to just go to bed. What do I do?!?!?

Oh, and I forgot to mention, in the midst of all this, I have puked 5 times today, smashed my very pregnant belly into a huge bedpost and spilled a bottle of water on my carpeted stairs....and got a flat tire.

Seriously??

One Year Later.....

Ok, so it's been a LONG time since I posted here! In fact, I am pregnant now and am actually due one day after the 1 year anniversary of my last post! Did I plan that?!? Uh, no. Irrelevant.

We are fully pee trained here, yippee!! Poop is a whole other issue that I don't care to get into right now. Someday, but not today. I am super tired, I worked a hard 4 hour shift. It's hard standing around doing SFA, you know! 31 more days till I am on Maternity Leave...hoping "they" get my insurance figured out before I am done! Paperwork, ugh.

Well Big Brother 8 is on in a few minutes.... have priorities, you know!

Oh, it's a girl, by the way! Can't wait!